Shawn Lovejoy’s blog always has good, godly advice for ministers, and today is no exception. He tackles the difficult topic of being a minister and still remaining sane and committed to spouse and family. (no easy task!)

http://shawnlovejoy.typepad.com/shawn_lovejoy/2008/08/marriage-and-ministry.html

Here’s my favorite hint:

When things are really crazy, rather than working late, I just get up earlier. I will get up as early as 3:30 AM (though that’s rare) so I can spend time with God, then get to work!  I an get a half day’s work in by 8:30!

I am more or less a morning person, but I don’t like to haul myself out of bed any earlier than six. Yet when I try to work in the evening, it first of all takes time away from Ken – and secondly, I’m not particularly productive in the evenings. I might have to try doing this!!

  • Jules

    It’s pretty much what I do – some days I’m up by 3.30am to take care of stuff and leave my evenings free after a day’s work. The last thing I want to do after a long day in the office is cook dinner, tackle laundry and housework etc, so I try to get stuff done before I go to work – stick some laundry on, get the crockpot going.

  • Jules

    It’s pretty much what I do – some days I’m up by 3.30am to take care of stuff and leave my evenings free after a day’s work. The last thing I want to do after a long day in the office is cook dinner, tackle laundry and housework etc, so I try to get stuff done before I go to work – stick some laundry on, get the crockpot going.

  • Pam

    We had this discussion in our woman’s group a couples months ago. We are all at different stages in life so it was interesting. The youngest women, pregnant with three children, and a worship leader said emphatically family is always first. While two older married women (one in charge of the food ministry and one leading the woman’s group)said no it has to be a balancing act. The question was asked what if God called you to do something that your husband wasn’t supportive of. What should you do? It was a great discussion.

  • Pam

    We had this discussion in our woman’s group a couples months ago. We are all at different stages in life so it was interesting. The youngest women, pregnant with three children, and a worship leader said emphatically family is always first. While two older married women (one in charge of the food ministry and one leading the woman’s group)said no it has to be a balancing act. The question was asked what if God called you to do something that your husband wasn’t supportive of. What should you do? It was a great discussion.

  • alycia

    Interesting topic…I’m not married, but i’ve heard this discussed over the years. The younger women (those not involved in ministry themselves however) do tend to say that the family comes first, while the older married women I’ve heard talk about this say it is a balancing act. Maybe because a lot of the CURRENT teaching about marriage and family stress “family first”, perhaps due to both husband and wife having careers, and it’s not so easy nowadays to “balance”?

  • alycia

    Interesting topic…I’m not married, but i’ve heard this discussed over the years. The younger women (those not involved in ministry themselves however) do tend to say that the family comes first, while the older married women I’ve heard talk about this say it is a balancing act. Maybe because a lot of the CURRENT teaching about marriage and family stress “family first”, perhaps due to both husband and wife having careers, and it’s not so easy nowadays to “balance”?

  • alycia

    Another thought along the lines of what Pam posted about her women’s group discussion…what if the HUSBAND was called by God into a certain ministry, but the wife wasn’t supportive? Is it just a matter of submission on her part?

  • alycia

    Another thought along the lines of what Pam posted about her women’s group discussion…what if the HUSBAND was called by God into a certain ministry, but the wife wasn’t supportive? Is it just a matter of submission on her part?

  • http://alycin.wordpress.com Alycin

    I learned in my physiology class today that if you don’t get enough sleep (at the very least, 7 hours for adults) that your entire body doesn’t function at top notch…

    Something to think about before you start thinking about being awake for 19 hours a day! ;)

  • http://alycin.wordpress.com Alycin

    I learned in my physiology class today that if you don’t get enough sleep (at the very least, 7 hours for adults) that your entire body doesn’t function at top notch…

    Something to think about before you start thinking about being awake for 19 hours a day! ;)

  • Jules

    I’d love to get 7 hours a night! But if I do I just don’t sleep at all the next night, so now I get somewhere around 5 or 6 and always wake up before the alarm – even at the weekend I wake up at the same time and can’t go back to sleep. It’s a problem I’ve had for 20+ years.

  • Jules

    I’d love to get 7 hours a night! But if I do I just don’t sleep at all the next night, so now I get somewhere around 5 or 6 and always wake up before the alarm – even at the weekend I wake up at the same time and can’t go back to sleep. It’s a problem I’ve had for 20+ years.

  • http://alycin.wordpress.com Alycin

    Jules, have you tried taking melatonin about 1/2 before you go to bed? It’s all natural and helps me sleep a full night without interruption.

  • http://alycin.wordpress.com Alycin

    1/2 an hour*

  • http://alycin.wordpress.com Alycin

    Jules, have you tried taking melatonin about 1/2 before you go to bed? It’s all natural and helps me sleep a full night without interruption.

  • http://alycin.wordpress.com Alycin

    1/2 an hour*

  • Jules

    No, it’s ‘off licence’ here – not available over the counter, and can only be prescribed by a doctor if he/she is prepared to be personally liable for any side-effects.

  • Jules

    No, it’s ‘off licence’ here – not available over the counter, and can only be prescribed by a doctor if he/she is prepared to be personally liable for any side-effects.

  • http://iamhealed.net Kathi

    Melatonin is? Wow. I thought it was one of the “safer” things to take.

    I tried it once. Slept like the dead for 4 hours then woke up and stayed awake (did I say AWAKE!!!!) for a long time after…

    My kids (both raging insomniacs) sometimes take a drug called Rozerem – it’s apparently a synthetic version of melatonin. As far as sleep meds go, it’s quite safe. Pretty effective too. You might inquire with the doc if it could help, Jules. I remember your sleep troubles from your visits and have always wondered how you get by on so little! ::hugs::

  • http://iamhealed.net Kathi

    Melatonin is? Wow. I thought it was one of the “safer” things to take.

    I tried it once. Slept like the dead for 4 hours then woke up and stayed awake (did I say AWAKE!!!!) for a long time after…

    My kids (both raging insomniacs) sometimes take a drug called Rozerem – it’s apparently a synthetic version of melatonin. As far as sleep meds go, it’s quite safe. Pretty effective too. You might inquire with the doc if it could help, Jules. I remember your sleep troubles from your visits and have always wondered how you get by on so little! ::hugs::

  • Jules

    I use that antihistamine (doxylamine succinate) I discovered when staying with you, Kathi. I don’t take it that often but when I really need to, it knocks me out for 12 hours and I catch up. I’m just an early morning person, I guess, so I try to make sure I go to sleep at an early hour. I survive, and I seem to need less sleep as I get older. Part of the problem is the bathroom is at the other end of the house and by the time I’ve negotiated my way round a horde of cats and books, I’m very much awake. I sleep much better when I’m doing regular exercise; that kind of flew out the window this year because work was so manic, but I’m aiming to get back to weight-training and swimming.

  • Jules

    I use that antihistamine (doxylamine succinate) I discovered when staying with you, Kathi. I don’t take it that often but when I really need to, it knocks me out for 12 hours and I catch up. I’m just an early morning person, I guess, so I try to make sure I go to sleep at an early hour. I survive, and I seem to need less sleep as I get older. Part of the problem is the bathroom is at the other end of the house and by the time I’ve negotiated my way round a horde of cats and books, I’m very much awake. I sleep much better when I’m doing regular exercise; that kind of flew out the window this year because work was so manic, but I’m aiming to get back to weight-training and swimming.

Kay Sharpe


I'm a laid-down lover of Jesus Christ. I write about my King and His Kingdom, the Bible, revival, healing, prophecy, faith, and more... plus I throw in recipes, tips, news and politics items, reviews, and all sorts of random things just for fun. Until recently, I was known as "Kathi"... but my name is now Kay. It's a good, God thing... :) The opinions expressed in this blog are mine and mine only - not necessarily shared by my husband, our church, my employers, or anyone else.

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